Things have been so confusing since I got here. Yesterday, it got worse… or better… I don’t know. I knew I liked boys. That’s why I asked my parents if I could go to seminary school. I mean, I didn’t tell them that was why. My father patted me on the shoulder and said, “If that’s what you think you should do,” with a very pleased smile on his face. Almost like he suspected the alternative was a flaming faggot son running around the community. My mother burst into tears. Every devout Catholic mother with three sons hopes one will become a priest.

So, off I went, and here I am. Another gay boy trying to stay on the path of righteousness by dedicating himself to the church. It’s not what I thought it would be, though. I guess I should have realized that I wouldn’t be the only gay boy looking for refuge in the seminary. I guess I thought we would all be keeping it secret and focusing on our vows of chastity. Instead, it’s just like gay high school. Guys running around making out in closets. Sneaking into each other’s rooms at night. Lots of inexperienced young men rapidly becoming experienced, like any young people, just a few years later than most.

I gave into temptation. Not in a really big way but enough that I couldn’t ignore it. I went to confession and told Father Patrick that I had sinned. He asked me questions and then, instead of making me say a million Hail Marys and swearing to never do it again, he made me get on my knees and put his penis in my mouth. Then he came to my side of the confessional, took my pants off and fucked me. Don’t get me wrong, it was amazing! I mean, it hurt at first but I learned how to relax and it felt great.

When Father Patrick asked me if I was a virgin, I didn’t know he was just trying to find out if he would be taking my cherry when he fucked me. Well, he did. He said not to tell anybody about it and I haven’t said a word, but I haven’t confessed to doing stuff with other boys in the dorms, anymore, either. I mean, I guess it doesn’t matter as much as I thought it did. When I see Father Patrick, he always gives me dark smoldering looks, like he’s remembering what it felt like when I was sitting on his lap riding his cock.There hasn’t been any chances to do it again, though, even if he wants to.

Yesterday, Father Aries requested that I help him in the chapel. I like Father Aries a lot. I’ve really been struggling in math. I always have. I guess I just don’t have a head for numbers. He’s been tutoring me, though. He’s really a good teacher and I’m making progress. He kind of reminds me of my cousin Tommy who I used to have a huge crush on, but I haven’t let myself think about Father Aries like that.

I reported to the chapel and we changed the altarcloth. That’s when things started getting weird. Father Aries asked me to help him take his stole and alb off and hang them up in the sacristy. When I came back, he took my cassock off. He wears an aftershave that’s sort of citrusy and herbal. He told me to step up close to him, and suddenly I was so conscious of how good he smells. It was making me uncomfortable.

Then I recognized the expression on his face. He was looking at me with the same kind of hungry look that Father Patrick has. Just as I thought I was realizing what was going on and trying to decide what to do about it, he kissed me. Just like that. Hard and soft at the same time, with his mouth open and his tongue pressing between my lips. It happened so fast that I couldn’t react, but my body decided for me and melted into his arms.

It felt good when Father Patrick fucked me. I’m not sorry it happened but I didn’t have a chance to decide if I really wanted it. Now, though, I do want Father Aries. I’m actually glad Father Patrick fucked me first because he taught me how to do it, and I’ll be better for Father Aries. In my mind everything was all scrambled together; my fantasies about cousin Tommy, and Father Aries being so kind to me, and the feeling of Father Patrick’s hard cock thrusting up into my guts, and how he moaned when I squeezed my hole around his cock.

I wanted to make Father Aries moan like that. To feel his hot seed inside of me. Fucking me with his slimy cock afterward like he’s trying to push his cum as far up in my guts as he can get it. I just never thought it would happen right there in the sanctuary, on the altar. I’m his now, though. Father Aries can fuck me anywhere he wants! It’s just… I don’t know… is it really ok?